Ethiopia is Ending International Adoptions: Today’s State Department Conference Call

National Adoption Awareness Month can be triggering for many adoptees, but it can also feel like a month of urgency to get involved and talk about adoption in a critical and transparent way. Today, I and other adoption community members, majority of them being adoptive parents (no shock there), engaged in a conference call held by the Department of State to discuss the current suspension of intercountry adoptions in Ethiopia.

While the conversation was enlightening, I couldn’t help but notice how so much of the conversations and questions was centered around advocacy efforts to push back against the Ethiopian government and to advocate on behalf of prospective adoptive parents. One person on the call even thanked the embassy for advocating for families. And for a moment, I caught myself gasping, because I thought to myself, yes adoption is a viable option for some, but shouldn’t we think about the impact it has on birth families and adoptees?

Why do adoptive parents continue to see themselves as victims when Ethiopia is pushing back on intercountry adoptions?

The State Department gave back instructions in April asking agencies not to make referrals for new adoptions, citing reasons for adoption coming to a halt due to corruption, the welfare of adopted children, and the lack of post placement reports. I would add another reason as an adoptee: the erosion of biological families, who are often left out of the conversation. However, prospective adoptive parents continue to hold a sense of entitlement and a sense of ethnocentrism which conveys that children are better off with them, and give no acknowledgment that Ethiopia’s efforts to end adoption might be positive.

Hopefully the Ethiopian government will work to reunify families and invest in family preservation efforts. As the call came to an end today, I decided to ask a question, based on the tone of the conversation, hoping that it would allow those fierce advocates for adoption to pause. My question was “Why does the State Department think Ethiopia has decided to end intercountry adoptions?” Their response walked a fine and diplomatic line, citing issues of severing cultural ties, welfare of children, and lack of post adoption reports.  I honestly asked this question to see how critical their response back would be. Again, it wasn’t surprising. While they acknowledged corruption, they didn’t cite possible trafficking, the murdering of adopted children, rehoming or displacement, because their job isn’t to critically educate people invested in adoption. It is to continue to push for adoption as a viable solution despite ethical dilemmas. Many of you might read this and ask me what side I’m on, why am I so anti adoption. I’m not.  Adoption has touched and impacted me in positive ways, but I and many adoptees have also been the victims of unethical practices that benefited many adoptive parents and caused birth parents pain and heartache that will last a lifetime and impact generations to come.

So my sense of advocacy comes from being a privileged adoptee who’s had the opportunity to reunite with my Ethiopian family and get answers regarding my relinquishment, but who also has spent hours on the phone with adoptees who have been harmed and paralyzed by the injustice of adoption. While I don’t know the intentions of the Ethiopia government, I hope that ending intercountry adoptions means providing services for families separated by poverty and for adoptees to have access to their birth records or any information. I’m no longer looking for the United States government to make a structural difference, despite having heard from numerous adoptees. I am sure that adoptees and their Ethiopian families need to be the ones to bring about long overdue change.

I Am Black History: Ethiopian Adoptees on Race, Identity, and More

I am Ethiopian, Ethiopian-American, black, African-American, American, and African. I am also an adoptee, an immigrant, and part of the African Diaspora. All these identities and categories have had different impacts in my life. As part of Black History Month, I collaborated on a video with three other Ethiopian adoptees (three of us raised in the US, one in Canada).

You can view it here: I Am Black History.

My thanks to Rahel Tafere

To Annettte-Kassaye

And to Mekdes SOulgarden.

You are all so beautiful, speaking truth to power.

Thank you also to Bryan Tucker of Closure for his incredible patience and talent in editing. My sisters at Lost Daughters have given me so much support and inspiration as we continue to #flipthescript.

Please watch our video, and share it with others. Let us know your thoughts. “Black History” means so much more than a month on the calendar.

Ethiopian Adoptees: Our Voices in Black History

Black History Month is a month set aside to learn, honor, and celebrate the achievements of black men and women through history who have paved the way for many people like myself. To honor Black History Month, I have collaborated with 3 transracial Ethiopian adoptees on a video project which aims to educate others on how Ethiopian adoptees fit into Black History Month.

Although most of us identify with being Ethiopian first, as transracial adoptees we’ve had to juggle multiple identities such as being immigrants, Ethiopian American, African, and black. Those multiple identities sometimes can be challenging and hard for us to explain to others. Often times our identities are challenged, with some people considering us not to even be black, and some who challenge the authenticity of our Ethiopian identities.

My hope with this project is also to pave a way for Ethiopian adoptees to be a part of the adoption discourse. I think it’s very important for us to share our experiences, because oftentimes our stories are being told through the adoptive parent perspective. That needs to be challenged and changed: no one should be speaking for adoptees except the adoptees themselves. Ethiopian adoptees may be the youngest wave of adoption to the United States, but we are loud and proud and ready for our voices to be heard.

I would like to thank my sisters at Lost Daughters for inspiring me through their #flipthescript campaign which was launched during National Adoption Month, and which I was also a part of. This project could have not been possible without Bryan Tucker, who is the producer of the highly regarded adoption documentary Closure and a huge adoption ally. Last but not least I would like to acknowledge Annette Kassaye, who has really been an amazing friend and teammate on this project. Looking forward to sharing this exciting venture with you all–the video will come out at the end of this month. Amaseganallo! Thank you!