Ethiopia is Ending International Adoptions: Today’s State Department Conference Call

Image result for Ethiopian map

National Adoption Awareness Month can be triggering for many adoptees, but it can also feel like a month of urgency to get involved and talk about adoption in a critical and transparent way. Today, I and other adoption community members, majority of them being adoptive parents (no shock there), engaged in a conference call held by the Department of State to discuss the current suspension of intercountry adoptions in Ethiopia.

While the conversation was enlightening, I couldn’t help but notice how so much of the conversations and questions was centered around advocacy efforts to push back against the Ethiopian government and to advocate on behalf of prospective adoptive parents. One person on the call even thanked the embassy for advocating for families. And for a moment, I caught myself gasping, because I thought to myself, yes adoption is a viable option for some, but shouldn’t we think about the impact it has on birth families and adoptees?

Why do adoptive parents continue to see themselves as victims when Ethiopia is pushing back on intercountry adoptions?

The State Department gave back instructions in April asking agencies not to make referrals for new adoptions, citing reasons for adoption coming to a halt due to corruption, the welfare of adopted children, and the lack of post placement reports. I would add another reason as an adoptee: the erosion of biological families, who are often left out of the conversation. However, prospective adoptive parents continue to hold a sense of entitlement and a sense of ethnocentrism which conveys that children are better off with them, and give no acknowledgment that Ethiopia’s efforts to end adoption might be positive.

Hopefully the Ethiopian government will work to reunify families and invest in family preservation efforts. As the call came to an end today, I decided to ask a question, based on the tone of the conversation, hoping that it would allow those fierce advocates for adoption to pause. My question was “Why does the State Department think Ethiopia has decided to end intercountry adoptions?” Their response walked a fine and diplomatic line, citing issues of severing cultural ties, welfare of children, and lack of post adoption reports.  I honestly asked this question to see how critical their response back would be. Again, it wasn’t surprising. While they acknowledged corruption, they didn’t cite possible trafficking, the murdering of adopted children, rehoming or displacement, because their job isn’t to critically educate people invested in adoption. It is to continue to push for adoption as a viable solution despite ethical dilemmas. Many of you might read this and ask me what side I’m on, why am I so anti adoption. I’m not.  Adoption has touched and impacted me in positive ways, but I and many adoptees have also been the victims of unethical practices that benefited many adoptive parents and caused birth parents pain and heartache that will last a lifetime and impact generations to come.

So my sense of advocacy comes from being a privileged adoptee who’s had the opportunity to reunite with my Ethiopian family and get answers regarding my relinquishment, but who also has spent hours on the phone with adoptees who have been harmed and paralyzed by the injustice of adoption. While I don’t know the intentions of the Ethiopia government, I hope that ending intercountry adoptions means providing services for families separated by poverty and for adoptees to have access to their birth records or any information. I’m no longer looking for the United States government to make a structural difference, despite having heard from numerous adoptees. I am sure that adoptees and their Ethiopian families need to be the ones to bring about long overdue change.

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Ethiopian Adoptees Are Also the Diaspora

When we discuss the Ethiopian Diaspora, people typically think of immigrants, refugees, and Ethiopian Americans. Adoptees often times are not acknowledged as part of the diaspora, not purposefully but because people are not aware of us. We are a wave of immigrants through adoption who have been displaced in many ways. Balancing our multiple identities as Ethiopians, Africans, Blacks, and Immigrants is a constant struggle. We never really feel at home in one place.

Although we share many parallels with Ethiopian immigrants and Ethiopian Americans, we often lack cultural confidence and competence. The huge disconnect for us as adoptees is that we in many ways don’t feel Ethiopian enough. Having been raised by white parents has stripped us of our Ethiopian identities and put us at a cultural disadvantage and isolation. For me, creating a community for Ethiopian adoptees was critical. When I established Ethiopian Adoptees of the Diaspora (EAD) with my co-founder Annette Kassaye, our mission was to create a space for adoptees to feel connected and at home. We’ve only been around for 6 months, and already the support and feedback have been amazingly empowering. Our Facebook fan page is at almost 600 likes. We have been contacted by journalists in Canada, the US, and Europe, and we have done interviews for newspapers and radio shows. We have appeared on TV through our involvement with the #flipthescript campaign, thanks to Lost Daughters. We have also spoken at conferences in Boston, NYC, and St. Louis.

Our most exciting venture is our upcoming anthology, Lions Roaring, Far From Home: An Anthology By Ethiopian Adoptees, which aims to tell the stories of Ethiopian adoptees in the diaspora. We have already had submissions from adoptees in Ethiopia, U.S, Canada, UK, France, Sweden, Germany, the Netherlands, and Belgium. It’s very exciting, and the perspectives of our contributors (as we envisioned) have a lot of variety.

The most impactful moment for me has been the support and feedback we’ve received from various Ethiopian communities. Through our work with EAD, the gap and disconnect between us adoptees and the Ethiopian community could possibly be bridged. Most recently, we connected with Ethiopian Diaspora Fellowship (EDF),  whose mission is to promote leadership development, public service, creative storytelling, training, and peer-to peer mentorship. They seek to increase cultural identities and to be a catalyst for growth and change in Ethiopia. Currently, EDF and EAD are working together to see how we could be of service to each other. Ethiopian Diaspora Fellowship has an amazing program to train Ethiopian Americans in the U.S and then send them to Ethiopia to work and volunteer in Ethiopia. This perfectly ties into what we at EAD hope to do some day. While we are a community working on adoption-related issues, one of our missions is to also go back and give back to Ethiopia. Aligning ourselves with organizations like EDF allows us to build our community worldwide. Although EAD’s following is largely by the adoption community, specifically adoptive parents of Ethiopian children, our hope is to expand our network and connect with Ethiopian immigrants, refugees, and all who are a part of the Ethiopian diaspora community.

Connecting with Rediate,the founder and Executive Director of Ethiopian Diaspora Fellowship, made me realize the need for educating the Ethiopian community about the adoptee community. Contrary to what others may believe, adoption in Ethiopia is a taboo, often misunderstood ,and its realities are often poorly communicated. Many Ethiopians understand issues regarding adoption, but the need for transparency with the community is very critical. While educating the Ethiopian community about adoption, I hope to make people more aware of the complexities, and to open doors for other possibilities to help families in need. Our next big step at Ethiopian Adoptees of the Diaspora is to establish ourselves as a non-profit organization, especially as we move toward establishing a presence in Ethiopia for adoptees who are there to visit, live, work, volunteer, search for their Ethiopian family, or learn about their culture. EAD is rapidly growing. Many thanks to those who continue to support us.

Girl's hands holding globe --- Image by © Royalty-Free/Corbis
Girl’s hands holding globe — Image by © Royalty-Free/Corbis